Author: Jonas Jonasson
Pages: 394
Pages Read: 394
After escaping from the clutches of the Pakistani secret police, Allan briefly meets Winston Churchill and then sets off for Sweden after having a short talk with the Prime minister about a new passport. As you would know if you read my previous posts, Allan was the man who solved the USA's biggest nuclear problem, building the Atomic bomb. But now the Russians wanted to know the secret to a nuclear arsenal too and so as soon as Allan settled down in a nice hotel in his home country, he was whisked away by the leading Soviet nuclear physicist to help the development of the Soviet Atomic bomb, in a submarine. He had one too many Vodkas on the trip and he later found out that he already spilled the beans, but more on that later. Before the Russians had kidnapped Allan, they had had the bright idea of kidnapping Einstein. Sadly instead of getting Einstein, they got his almost identical brother, Herbert, who for publicity reasons was known as his cousin. Sadly he had less brains than a tortoise and was immediately deported to the Gulag, a Russian correction prison. Allan met a similar fate, after departing from his now good friend Yury the nuclear physicist he had a meeting with Stalin, which didn't go too well. Long story short he was also deported to the Gulag, on the same vehicle as poor Herbert Einstein He spent five years at the camp, working with Herbert, until he decided, enough was enough, he needed Vodka. So he hatched an escape plan which mainly involved Herbert, his dimwitted companion.
As Herbert was a known idiot, when he would make a wrong turn and accidentally end up in the guards office, he would only be shouted at, whereas others would be shot on the spot, so he "accidentally" found a rocket launcher in one of the guards' weapons rooms. Allan quickly blew up one of the containers, that was being shipped to North Korea. Sadly this was the one full of blankets, and not high explosives, but luckily, or not so luckily for some people, some of the prisoners tried to escape using the smoke as a shield. One of the guards immediately shot him down using a mounted machine gun and tracer rounds, but not before he accidentally hit one of the containers. This caused a chain reaction which in the end destroyed the entire Gulag and the nearby city. Long story short, he escaped, met Kim Il Song, ruler of North Korea, and after quite a few plot twists ended up in Indonesia, where Herbert found the love of his life, Anastasia. They where both complete idiots, but that was okay, with the money that they had received from the Chinese ruler, they started a corrupt business. Anastasia rose up the ranks, until she became governess of Indonesia, at which point they all got bored and moved to France. He then found a communist traitor in the French advisory and became an American spy, he then met Yury once again and together they faked Nuclear weapons reports and sending the to the USA to calm down some tension, although when the found some things a little too boring, they made a crazy diagram, which in turn crumbled the Soviet Union. He then returned home to Sweden and Lived in a cottage with his cat, Molotov, before he accidentally blew the whole thing sky high. This then led to him going to the retirement home, which is where the whole book started. As for him and his friends in the present day, they where proved innocent and all moved to Jamaica together, to have a very long holiday.
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